Ryther - Healthy Children, Stronger Families

15-year-old “Matson” came to Cottage B, Ryther’s Substance Abuse Inpatient Program, addicted to marijuana, ecstasy and alcohol, as well as suffering from depression and anxiety. Despite being a very bright sophomore in high school, Matson had poor attendance and was already behind on credits for graduation. He really had difficulty relating to his peers because of poor social skills and high social anxiety.

Matson wanted to get clean, but struggled to make friends outside his superficial “ready-made” peer group which was based primarily on their desire to use drugs. Matson explained that he could always make friends with other kids who were using drugs because they were easy to relate to without really knowing them. Additionally, it was easy to talk them when he was high—it took the edge off his social anxiety.

While at Ryther’s Cottage B, he worked with counselors to develop interpersonal effectiveness skills to help him make friends. He learned how to start a conversation and pay attention to the concept of personal space. He became able to use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to manage his depression. Learning new ways to make friends and relate to his peers helped Matson deal with depression without continuing to use drugs. He gained confidence and found that people like him just the way he is – clean and sober.

Ryther’s experiential therapies were also incredibly effective for Matson and helped him learn how to work within a team framework and communicate his ideas effectively. He could solve problems easily, but had a hard time explaining his thoughts and often came across as demanding or demeaning. Using leadership skills learned on Ryther’s Challenge Course, he learned that by taking a step back from a situation he could give himself the chance to think about how he would frame something and anticipate how others may receive what he was saying.

Matson’s family was also involved in the treatment process giving his parents ways to set appropriate boundaries for Matson.

After graduating from Cottage B, Matson has found a new peer group and is involved in school activities. He is expected to graduate on time. He looks forward to attending college, and is even considering graduate school.

An open letter from Sheila to her foster son at the time, DJ, after she had first met him (view DJ’s full story here):

Dear DJ,

It was a beautiful sunny Saturday. You were dressed like a little old man, in your khaki pants and white polo shirt. Running up the front steps, coat flying behind, your first words to me were “You got any kids?” Unhappy with my answer, you blew past me into the house.

In the house you moved so fast. Inspecting everything, touching the next thing before your last “What is this?” was answered. You were fascinated with the tulips I had growing in a pot.

At dinner you said “Maybe I could live here.” I asked you why you might want to live with me. Your answer is etched in my mind: “It smells fresh in here, and you have those ‘twinkle lights,’ and ‘this,’” holding up an oversized paper clip.

That night you tried everything in your arsenal of kid tactics to convince me you should be able to watch an inappropriate movie, including your now infamous argument, “I’m a grown man.” When that proved unsuccessful, you tilted your head away from me, with tears in your eyes, and said you hated me.

Looking as though you were testing the words for the first time, you simply puffed them in the air. I couldn’t help but smile.

That was the moment I knew…I had fallen in love, and we were going to be just fine!

- – - – - – -

If you or someone you know are interested in becoming a foster parent, please consider joining us at a free foster parent information session every first Monday of the month at 6pm on Ryther’s main campus. Call 206.517.0273 ext. 11 for more information or visit this page.

Jason & Sue, Kids in Motion Facilitators

Ryther’s New After School Group Helps “Garrett” Succeed

“What’s the first rule of Kids in Motion?” A few children sitting in the circle raise their hands, and one of Ryther’s therapists Jason Franklin, MA LMHC CMHS, calls on “Garrett”: “Be safe! Don’t be crazy and, like, crash into things—respect other’s space.” Jason and his co-facilitator Susan Prescott, MSW LICSW, nod in agreement and move on to the second rule. Ryther’s Kids in Motion (KIM), a new program being offered to children ages 8 to 12 and teen mentors in the community, is a therapeutic group that focuses on developing cooperation, impulse control and concentration. The evidence-informed curriculum incorporates experiential activities, theatre games, exercise and teamwork to build a range of therapeutic skills in a supportive, fun and creative environment.

While KIM can target ADHD symptoms, it really is for any kid who needs extra help with coping skills, relaxation techniques, feelings identification or expression, social skills or communicating.

When Garrett first started KIM, he was very anxious, shy and quiet. His parents were afraid he would get overwhelmed by more rambunctious kids. However, by the time KIM fi , he became a leader. He experienced what being more confident and advocating for himself looked like and learned to tolerate frustration. His mother and teacher both noticed this change in Garrett and attributed it solely to KIM as it was the only program or therapy he participated in. But it didn’t feel like therapy to him.

Children performing "body sculpting" exercise

One of the activities that really helped Garrett was “body sculpting”—an exercise where volunteers freeze in space and the other participants label their positions with descriptive words or stories. By recognizing what body language is communicating to others, kids experientially learn to identify feelings and social skills in themselves. These activities work with all different types of learning styles. By seeing what anxiety or shyness looks like in other people, Garrett could work on his own traits.

Ryther therapists Jason and Susan tailored their interactions with Garrett based on goals set with his parents. Jason noted that “Parents always give great feedback. If a child has certain strengths or challenges, we can adapt the program to help each kid succeed. Parents love it.”

Whether it’s more respect for physical boundaries, increased impulse control, better social skills and self-esteem or another goal, children come out of KIM having fun and being motivated to return each session.

Ryther offers Kids in Motion, developed and facilitated by Jason Franklin, MA LMHC CMHS, in the fall and spring of each year for an hour and fifteen minutes a week for 8 weeks. The next group starts September 30. For more information, call Jason at 206.517.0295.

By Ryther Staff

“Children at Ryther succeed not when they reach the top, but when they decide to keep moving up.”
–Ryther Experiential Therapist, (Joleen)

“It was so scary. I had trouble reaching and I kept telling myself I could do it. It made me feel proud.”
–“Nickolas” age 10

Children often have a hard time putting their feelings into words. Experiential Therapy offers a way to work through challenges and make connections without words.  On the wall, children have to cope with not getting their desired result right away. If a child does not reach a goal, they still learn to identify frustrations and deal with not succeeding the first time around.

The ability to identify emotions, react appropriately, and keep trying is some of the skills the climbing wall can teach children for use in every aspect of their lives. Emotion regulation is important as is being aware of one’s body and feelings. Nicolas’ long term goal is to be successful in a family. He needs to be able to handle his frustrations and Experiential Therapy gives him a way of seeing that this goal is a really big goal. It shows him that he can overcome setbacks and persevere.”

To learn about Ryther’s outpatient counseling click here or call 206.525.5050.